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SELECTED LETTERS > SELECTED LETTERS - PART I > To Lakshmidas Gandhi > To Lakshmidas Gandhi
26. To Lakshmidas Gandhi
27. V. 1906, Johannesburg
Respected brother,
I have your letter of the 17th April. I do not what to say. You are prejudiced against me. There is no remedy against prejudice. I am helpless. I can only reply to your letter in full.
1. I have no idea of separating from you.
2. I claim nothing there.
3. I do not claim anything as mine.
4. All that I have is being utilized for public purposes.
5. It is available to relations who devote themselves to public work.
6. I could have satisfied your desire for money if I had not dedicated my all public use.
I have never said that I have done much for brothers or other relations. I gave them all that I could save; and this I have mentioned not out of pride, and only to friends.
Rest assured that I will cheerfully assume the burden of supporting the family in case you pass on before me. You need have no fear on that score.
I am not now in a position to send you money as you desire.
It is well if Harilal is married; it is also well if he is not. For the present at any rate I have ceased to think of him as a son.
I am willing to go to India to attend Maniís wedding if at all possible. But I cannot give you any idea of my present condition. I am so hard pressed for time that I scarcely know what to do. Please cable the date of marriage, so that if possible I might hold myself in readiness to go.
I might perhaps inform you that I am in debt to Revashankarbhai.
You may repudiate me, but still I will be to you what I have always been.
I do not remember that I expressed a desire to separate from you when I was there. But even if I did, my mind is now quite clear, my aspiration are higher and I have no desire for worldly enjoyments of any type whatever.
I am engaged in my present activities as I look upon them as essential life. If I have to face death while thus engaged, I shall face it with equanimity. I am now a stranger to fear.
I like those who are pure in heart. Young Kalyandas, Jagmohandasís son, is like Pralhad in spirit. He is therefore dearer to me than one who is a son because so born.